Expect the Worst, Hope for the Best

If any of you know me, you'll know that I tend not to be an incredibly optimistic person when it comes to certain things. I'm very perceptive to what is really happening (to a fault) and sometimes assume things even before they happen. Or I get upset/sad because I know what is going to happen before it happens, especially when things could get bad. I recently had a conversation with a guy, that the whole day beforehand I was thinking about. I thought about all the possible ways that this conversation could go. I saw one single good way that the conversation could end well. Every other way was bad. Now I'm not saying I'm just overly depressing...I try not to be. But I could easily see this going in a whole lot of different ways, none of which would accomplish anything. So I met with this guy a little while ago, and when we met I almost couldn't do it. My nerves were completely shot the entire time. I'm pretty sure that my hands were shaking the whole time, and I had to stop my leg from doing so. I couldn't even think as to what I was trying to say, but somehow I said everything that I think needed to be said. Going into this discussion, I was expecting the worst. I could rationalize the worst, and see how the worst would fall into place. I couldn't see any good. I was expecting the worst, but somehow I came out of this discussion with peace of mind...something I had not expected. On a scale of where the discussion went, it didn't go well. So now I'm back to expecting the worst for the future, but hoping for the best. These are the instances that God is seen clearest. I see no light, no good, no hope in something, and I realize there's nothing I can do about it. But then out of nowhere somehow it ends better than expected.

This of course throws me two more observations. Does our expectation of where things go match up with where God thinks they should go? AND...do we not sometimes miss the sucecss that we have through the journey, as opposed to the destination? These can both be talked about for quite a while, but I'm done here for the day.